Your Misery Is Not a Merit Badge

Every school has one. The teacher who arrives before the janitor, leaves after the sunset, and mentions—purely by "accident"—that they spent their entire Sunday color-coding a curriculum map that isn't due for three months. In the staffroom, these stories are often traded like currency. It is the "Suffering Olympics," where the gold medal goes to the person with the highest caffeine-to-blood ratio and the least amount of sleep. But here is the uncomfortable truth: exhaustion is not a pedagogy.

The "Super Teacher" myth suggests that to be effective, one must be empty. This narrative implies that if a teacher isn't bleeding out for the job, they simply don't care about the kids. It turns professional boundaries into "quiet quitting" and makes leaving at the end of the contract day feel like a heist. It is time to retire the cape; it’s likely a tripping hazard anyway.

🔉 But first, a word from today’s sponsor

Find out why 100K+ engineers read The Code twice a week.

That engineer who always knows what's next? This is their secret.

Here's how you can get ahead too:

• Sign up for The Code - tech newsletter read by 100K+ engineers

• Get latest tech news, top research papers & resources

• Become 10X more valuable

Join 100k+ engineers

🚀 Noteworthy News

👉️ Language Learning at any Age: Older Adults May Struggle to Learn a New Language but Classes are a Worthwhile Experience 

👉️ Research: Is Education Research Actually Helping Teachers?

👉️ What the kids are saying: ‘6-7’ Doesn’t Mean Anything. Linguists say that’s the Point 

The Cult of the Perpetual Sufferer

The Martyr Complex thrives on a specific kind of social validation. It feels good to be the one who "does it all," but that "all" often comes at the expense of hobbies, health, and family. When the staffroom culture begins to revolve around who has it worse, it creates a toxic environment where self-care is viewed as a weakness. A teacher’s value is not measured by the number of hours they spend suffering in a fluorescent-lit room after everyone else has gone home.

In reality, the law of diminishing returns applies to teaching just as much as it does to economics. A teacher working on their 14th hour of the day is not providing the same quality of instruction as one who is well-rested and has a life outside the classroom. The "Martyr Teacher" might have the prettiest bulletin boards, but if they are too exhausted to show up with patience and presence, the students aren't actually winning.

The 3:01 PM Great Escape

Leaving on time is a skill that requires practice and a lack of shame. The "Contract Hour Hard Stop" is a challenge to treat the end of the workday as a firm boundary rather than a suggestion. To make this work, the "15-Minute Loop-Close" is essential. Instead of grading that one last paper, the final 15 minutes of the day should be spent resetting the physical space and writing a "Done List" for the next morning. When the bell rings, the laptop shuts.

This isn't about doing less; it’s about doing the job within the hours allotted for the job. Transitioning from "Teacher Mode" to "Human Mode" requires a physical break. Whether it’s changing clothes immediately upon getting home or listening to a non-educational podcast on the drive, the goal is to leave the classroom in the classroom. The school will still be there tomorrow, and miraculously, it will not have burned down in the intervening sixteen hours.

Closing the Bank of "You"

Then there is the financial martyrdom. The "Wallet Freeze" is a necessary intervention for the teacher who views the Target dollar spot as a charitable donation. While buying a pack of pencils is one thing, the thousands of dollars spent annually on classroom furniture, high-end decor, and snacks is a subsidy the system has come to rely on. When teachers fill the gaps with their own paychecks, they prevent the administration and the public from seeing that the gaps exist in the first place.

When a colleague drops the inevitable "Must be nice to leave so early!" or "I could never leave my kids with those old textbooks," it’s time for the Martyr Deflector script. A simple, cheerful response works best: "It is nice! I’ve realized my brain works better when I’m not staring at a screen until dinner." Or, "I’ve decided to stick to the school’s budget this year to see what we actually need." It’s not a confrontation; it’s a boundary.

The Systemic Cost of Sinking Ships

There is a deeper, more professional reason to stop overworking: it is a form of systemic gaslighting. When every teacher in a building works 60 hours a week to make a 40-hour job look functional, the "system" believes the 40-hour job is actually possible. Martyrdom masks the need for more staff, better resources, and realistic expectations. By refusing to overwork, teachers are performing an act of professional honesty.

Furthermore, students are astute observers of adult behavior. If they see their teachers as frazzled, broke, and perpetually stressed, they learn that "success" or "passion" looks like misery. Modeling boundaries and a balanced life is perhaps the most important lesson a teacher can provide. It shows students that they, too, are allowed to have a life that is not defined solely by their productivity.

Permission to Be a Person

Being a "good" teacher and being a person with a life are not mutually exclusive. In fact, they are deeply dependent on one another. The most inspiring educators are often the ones who have interesting stories from their weekend hikes, who have seen the latest movies, and who actually have the energy to laugh when a second-grader tells a joke that makes no sense.

Take the "Contract Hour" challenge for one week. Leave when the clock says it’s time to leave. Don’t check the email after 5:00 PM. Don't buy the extra stickers. The world—and the classroom—will keep spinning, and the person staring back in the mirror will be much happier to see the sunrise..

WHAT DO YOU THINK?

We would LOVE to hear from you!

Reply to this email, or send us a message on Instagram! We’re here to walk with you in these crazy times!

Part of what makes The PEN Weekly community so special is the fact that our readers are teachers from around the world! We’re not going to lie, we think that’s pretty darn cool!

We’ll see you again on Wednesday 🍎

Share this newsletter!

Do you know someone who would appreciate reading the PEN? Share this newsletter with them! Our goal is to reach as many teachers as possible, and to build a community of teachers supporting teachers.